For several
moments, I could not find any other words. Apparently, neither could Wilbur,
nor Mattie who looked very glum, his tears now sobs.
Belatedly
realising we were all still standing on or near the doorstep, I silently waved
them inside and gestured toward the living area. Mattie wiped his tears with a
colourful handkerchief.
When we
reached the living room, Wilbur broke the silence. “I was hoping Mattie would
revive your memories, Ernest.”
“Steven!” I
erupted, far too loudly. “Whatever you damned well think, my name is Steven.
Will you please call me Steven!?”
Mattie
blubbered a little more loudly, but said nothing. Wilbur retained his
poker-face, and watched me intently. Apparently, none of us were relaxed enough
to sit down.
“Surely
now,” I said, “you must realise I’m not Ernest. For god’s sake, I’m not gay. I
have two children.” I belatedly realised that was hardly any proof of being
heterosexual, not in a world of IVF, surrogate mothers and adoptions. I faced
Mattie. “Okay, that’s no longer definitive. Just the same, if I had been married to you… I’m sure I’d remember!”
“O Ernie,”
wailed Mattie, fresh tears springing forth.
I sighed
loudly. “This is ridiculous,” I said, turning to Wilbur. “I suppose the next
thing you’ll be telling me is you and I are lovers.”
Wilbur
smiled. “No, we’re just friends. Although we have become close, I would say,
having spent so much time on your project.”
“What
project?”
“Your
latest historical project.” He turned to Mattie, and put a comforting hand on
his shoulder. “I’m sorry Mattie—I really thought you would bring back Ernest’s
memories.”
Calming
down a little, and in deference to Mattie’s distress, I restrained from
correcting Wilbur about my name.
“I’ll be
all right,” said Mattie, sniffling.
“Perhaps
you’d like a tea?” Wilbur asked him.
“No,
thanks,” said Mattie. “I should just go. My needay starts shortly.” He finished
wiping his tears.
“I’ll drive
you there,” said Wilbur.
Mattie
pocketed his handkerchief and started making his way to the front door,
followed by Wilbur.
“Perhaps
you should wait a few minutes,” I said, starting to feel compassion, but
remaining in the living room. “Until you feel more at ease.”
“No, thank
you Ernie.” He stopped, and looked contrite. “I’m sorry, I can’t call you
Steven. To me, you’ll always be my sweet Ernie.” He looked like he was on the
verge of rushing to embrace me again, but then suddenly opened the door and
left without another word or even glance.
Wilbur
lingered on the doorstep, facing me. “I’ll be back in about fifteen minutes.”
“I divorced him,” I said, quietly. “Right? Not the other way round.”
“Yes,” said
Wilbur. Then, hopefully, “You remember?”
“No, I do not remember. It just figures.”
Wilbur
left.
Almost at once,
the room darkened. Through a window, I could see a large dark puffy cloud pass
over the sun, many more close behind, towering up to stratospheric heights. How appropriate, I thought. For my state of mind. Lightning and
thunder when I arrived in this dream, and now soon to return. So soon. How long
had it been? Quick recalls of a bush-walk, supposed sleep the rest of that day
and most of the next, the rest of that with Wilbur—that was yesterday… so, I’d
been in Jibilee just two days. Or more likely one day, if the bush walk was, as
I suspected, a dream within a dream.
Jibilee! I
abruptly realised that for all I’d learned since ‘waking’ at Wilbur’s, I still
didn’t know exactly where Jibilee was—where the hell I was. That suddenly seemed important as I watched storm clouds
gather.
So I moved
to Ernest’s study, started the computer and the web browser, and quickly found
some maps. I barely recognised Australia. Its outline was unchanged
(mercifully!), but there was no sign of any states, consistent with what Wilbur
had said. Capital cities were gone, too, though hordes of much smaller cities
with unfamiliar names occupied their locations. Most of the rural areas—apart
from the expansive deserts and mountain ranges of course—were similarly dotted
with mostly new names, clustered into small interconnected groups. I magnified
the view, to reveal a decentralised fractal network, each level mimicking the
next. It disoriented me. “Where the hell am I?” I bemoaned, unaware of having
clichéd. Eventually, I found Chord in what should have been marked as Victoria,
on the outskirts of where Melbourne should have been.
I was
indeed home. Or very near it at least: Chord was a few kilometres further from
the old city centre than the house I lived in with Yvette and our children. I
magnified the view further to hone in on Jibilee, which turned out to be near
the outskirts of Chord—in what I always knew of as a rural area. In a similarly
contradictory fashion, I saw no marks of habitation where my house and its
neighbours should have been, hardly even any roads. My home might have been only
a long walk away, but there was no obvious route to it.
Call it
homesickness, but I felt a burning desire to see it. I felt no certainty that I
would—as the map implied, this dream might well decide to have something
entirely different there in its place—but I felt an overpowering urge to try.
When Wilbur
returned, I wasted no time explaining my desire, showed him the location on the
computer, and pointed out there was no point me trekking blindly about in
unfamiliar territory when someone who presumably knew his way could help me. He
immediately agreed. Perhaps he thought the exercise would prove to me that I
was wrong.
But when we
exited the front door, storm clouds building above us, and lightning flashing,
I froze. There under the carport was a two-seater car like those I’d seen since
waking in Wilbur’s room—but with the exact deep violet colour as the one driven
by the demon! Just as I saw it, a thunderclap erupted. Clichéd even for a dream,
though I was too stunned to realise it at the time.
“Are you
all right?” said Wilbur, snapping me out of my shock.
“Uh… yeah,
sure,” I lied, still staring at the car. Dreams
within dreams, I silently reminded myself. But my mounting sense of
discomfort did not ease.
“You look
like you’ve seen a ghost,” said Wilbur.
With an
effort, I turned my attention to him, and tried to hide my anxiety. “Not quite.
Just surprised by the thunder.”
Wilbur did
not look entirely convinced, but must have decided to put his doubts aside.
“Well, if we’re going, can I suggest we get in before the rain starts?”
I hesitated
before nodding agreement, and moved to the car. There must be plenty of cars the same colour, I tried to convince
myself—I just hadn’t seen any until now. Surreptitiously, or so I hoped, I
checked inside for demons ready to pounce. Finding none, I cautiously took a
seat.
As Wilbur
entered the car, his prominent wrist bracelet clinked against the door.
“Is that a
family heirloom?” I asked.
Wilbur
suddenly smiled, almost slyly. “No.”
Only then
did I notice that the car had no steering wheel or floor pedals. I turned to
Wilbur, ready to voice my surprise, only to see him hover his Babel over what
looked like a small button on the blank dashboard—which suddenly lit up with
mostly familiar but entirely digital signs: speedometer, odometer, econometer,
others. Wilbur gripped what looked like a joystick—atop an arm rest on the door—and
in apparent response to his gentle pressure, the car backed out of the
driveway. The engine was inaudible. Only when I lowered my window and listened
for it, could I hear its faint hum. But I had to close the window almost
immediately, as rain began to fall—lightly at first, then torrentially.
I said
nothing, but watched Wilbur carefully, eventually realising that pulling back
on the stick caused the car to break, tilting it to the left or right steered
the car, and a button near the top of the stick switched from reverse to
forward (and back again presumably). As well as seeing no gears, I felt none
being changed.
As Wilbur
drove, I kept expecting him to speed up. After what seemed a small eternity but
was probably no more than two minutes, full of rolling thunder and dazzling
lightning, I could stand the slow-motion no longer. “Even this rain doesn’t
warrant such sloth,” I exclaimed. “Can’t this thing go any faster?”
“Considerably,
but not without breaking the law.”
“You’re
only doing thirty kilometres an hour!”
“Yes, the
limit.”
“Thirty?!
Fifty, surely?”
“Thirty is
the maximum speed allowed on any residential road—except for emergency vehicles
of course.”
“But it’s
so slow. How can you hold yourself to such a speed?”
“Like most
things, it’s a matter of practice. Or would be if it weren’t for the automatic
speed limiter. Those who are in a hurry, like yourself apparently, must simply
content themselves with knowing that the speed limit makes it very difficult to
cause a fatality. The traffains, of course, are considerably faster.”
“Traffains?”
I said, half expecting another tail feather to sprout.
“The main
traffic arteries.”
Almost as
soon as he said this, we turned onto something resembling a freeway, but
augmented by well separated and protected bicycle lanes, a rail line down the
middle, and with a traffic volume barely as much as a typical main street after
midnight. Wilbur quickly accelerated to one hundred kph, matching the handful
of Concorde-cars within sight.
Lining both
sides of the road were dense screening hedges and trees, not a house or
construction in sight. I thought we must have left Chord, but when I quizzed
Wilbur, he said we were still on its outskirts, houses not far on either side
of us. I looked in vain for them—only giving up when Wilbur announced we were leaving Chord. Try as I might, I
could not see any transition in the landscape whatsoever.
To my
further inquiries, Wilbur explained that intra-city traffains had different
‘levels’, depending on their location: slower, less spacious ones were linked
to faster versions. Ours was the fastest in Chord, connecting it to neighbouring
cities.
A winding
exit put us on a straight bitumen road just wide enough for two cars, but
devoid of traffic. Wilbur slowed slightly.
With the
storm starting to ease, I tried to see into the thick open bushland flanking
the sides of the road. There was nothing about it in particular that I
recognised, yet it held an eerie sense of familiarity…
Constant rain…
constant wipers… dripping kangaroos… dim rain-drenched forested hills… one like
a truncated pyramid… a bridge over a creek… steep banks…
“Stop!” I
shouted, moments after crossing the bridge. Wilbur obliged without the
half-expected screech of tyres, braking gently and unhurriedly. “Can you back
up to the bridge?” I said. He did so, and as I looked through the car window at
the creek, its surface dappled by rain, I knew this was where I had rested
shortly before seeing the demon. I was on the same road I had walked two days
before.
“This road
stops being straight about now,” I said, “doesn’t it? It starts winding and
curving, right?”
Wilbur studied
me carefully it seemed, with just a hint of surprise on his poker-face. “Yes, I
think so. Is your memory starting to come back, Ernest?”
“Not of
Ernest’s life—but of what happened to me, soon after this dream started. You
can drive on now.”
He did, and
yes, for the next two or more kilometres, as the rain eased, the road curved
and was exactly as I remembered it.
My bush
walk couldn’t have been a dream, after all, I realised.
Or at least
not a separate one.
But then
that meant the demon was part of this dream too.
Unless only
my bush walk was part of this dream and, without realising, I fell asleep
within it and dreamt of the demon?
Aaagh! It
should have been academic which level of the dream the demon appeared in, yet
it wasn’t. I wanted him as far away as possible.
The last
drops of rain ended, and storm clouds began to lift, as Wilbur slowed and
stopped the car on the edge of the road. “This is it,” he said. “Where you
wanted me to take you. Or as far as we can go by car at least. The spot you’re
interested in is about a hundred metres through there.” He pointed into the
bush on the left. It looked no different to the remainder of the surrounding landscape—there
was nothing to distinguish it as a residential area, or as ever having been
one.
We left the
car and tramped up a gentle slope.
“What is it
you hope to see here?” Wilbur asked.
“I don’t
really know. Something! A sign, perhaps. I don’t know.” This journey was a
mirror image of my walk when the dream began, but I had to admit there was
every chance it would prove to be utterly futile.
“All you’re
likely to see is more bush,” said Wilbur. “There’ve been no houses here for two
or three decades, not since the local land use structure was finalised.”
“You mean
there were houses here,” I said,
surprise and hope mingling just beyond the grip of rationality.
“Yes. A
few. Mostly old and fairly scattered. But they’ve been recycled and the area returned
to natural bush—apart from some farmland a few kilometres to the north. You can
see how recent the changes were: other than a few older specimens, the trees
here are all less than thirty years old.”
We walked
in silence then, but my mind kept running over Wilbur’s words. I could not put
my finger on it—or perhaps deep down I did not want to—but there was something
very unsettling about what he’d said.
Lost in
unresolved thoughts, it did not seem long before Wilbur halted. “Well,” he
said, “as near as I can make it, we’re here.” He looked at me. “This is where
you wanted me to take you.”
I looked
about us. It was just more of the same non-descript bush I’d seen before, full
of tall native grasses, dense shrubs and towering trees. This couldn’t have been where my home was
meant to be. “Are you sure?” I asked, plaintively.
“As sure as
I can be. Nice spot.” He suddenly raised his eyes skyward, bent forward at the
waist to almost a forty-five degree angle, and, pressing thumb and forefinger
of one hand lightly together near his mouth, fluttered the remaining fingers.
“A hamburger joint’d really clean up here,” he said in a lazy American accent.
I was too
surprised by his actions, and disappointed by what we’d found, to realise for
some seconds that Wilbur had just done the worst Groucho Marx impersonation I’d
ever seen.
As if mockingly,
storm clouds suddenly parted for the sun to cascade off raindrops suspended in
the surrounding greenery. A taller tree, perhaps thirty metres away behind many
others, stood out, its striking white bark almost blinding in the sudden sun.
I rushed
towards it.
Wilbur
followed hurriedly. “What is it?” he asked, mercifully impersonating no one.
When I
reached it, I was in no doubt: it was the same tree I had seen just after the
dream started: the taller thicker version of the one outside my bedroom window.
And there too was the other one, with the scar from a fallen branch, exactly
where I remembered it relative to the first tree—in the same position as at
home.
“This is
it,” I brayed. “Where I first woke up in this dream.” I immediately realised
the contradiction, but couldn’t be bothered correcting it. “And this tree, and
that one over there,” I added, pointing, “they’re in my garden at home. Except,
here they’re taller. I’m sure of it, we’re standing where my bedroom should
be.”
A sudden
and, I must admit, belated realisation struck me. “Where my bedroom was! This is where my home was!” The trees were those outside my home, but older. Even the creek was the one
Yvette was involved with, but after decades of devoted care, it had recuperated
and thrived.
“I have travelled in time,” I whispered in
shock.
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Part 3![]() |